Mascot Royal Rumble: Which mascots in the Marlins organization can I take in a battle?

[Britos]

 If you're reviewing this,  it implies the Miami Marlins haven't yet drew the trigger on a blockbuster trade or the team is mired in a lengthy shedding streak.As a 25-year-old guy with way too much time on my hands,  I often ponder which animals I can absorb a battle. These thoughts commonly stay within my own head,  now,  you're all mosting likely to hear it.I have actually ranked each mascot from the Marlins organization-- including the big league group and full-season small league associates-- in terms of exactly how well I  would certainly make out versus them in a fight-to-the-death. From ideal to worst,  here's exactly how I believe I 'd do.Kazoo (Double-A Pensacola Blue Wahoos) Courtesy of Pensacola Blue WahoosAccording to heaven Wahoos web site,  Kazoo is an imaginary "marine creature." He has actually webbed feet and fins for ears. Possibly his webbed appendages would certainly supply a solid put throughout my face,  but that's actually all he's got.His biography on their site says he likes making people laugh,  playing the kazoo,  analysis,  and angling. He honestly feels like a quite chill person. That's precisely why he's at the top of this list.Some people (or pets) have the "battle" genetics,  and others don't. If Kazoo and I were battling over the last piece of food on a deserted island,  I  would certainly make fast work of him. Scampi (Triple-A Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp) Thanks To Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp and Jim BradyIf the Phillie Phanatic mated with one of the Marlins' auto racing sea animals,  it would certainly look like Scampi. He may not be physically imposing,  yet if he does have Phanatic blood in him,  he's mosting likely to have an edge to him. Remember,  the Phanatic as soon as went toe-to-toe with Tommy Lasorda.Certain sort of shrimp can deliver a punch that travels at the very same rate as a.22-caliber rifle. Possibly not Scampi,  however. I assume I  would certainly get some bumps and contusions,  however I could take him.Hamilton R. Head (Low-A Jupiter Hammerheads) Politeness of Roger Dean Chevrolet StadiumI recognize what you're assuming: "Alex,  surely you could not combat a shark." That's where you're incorrect,  chum. Mr. Head appears daunting in the beginning,  yet my "searching record" states hammerheads are amongst the more docile shark varieties worldwide. According to the International Shark Attack Documents Marlins Store,  there has just been 16 videotaped hammerhead assaults on human beings,  and none of them were deadly. Reasonably talking,  Mr. Head does not have a big enough mouth to trigger significant damages to me.His just two advantages are his sharp teeth and his size. According to the Jupiter Hammerheads' web site,  Hamilton is 7'5". According to my old Joint account,  I am just 6'4". Ultimately,  I believe I can manage this one.Poopsie (High-A Beloit Skies Carp) Politeness of Beloit Skies Carp"Sky Carp" is an additional nickname for geese. For those that have actually never lived up north,  geese are jerks. Envision if chihuahuas can fly and had lengthy necks. Poopsie is the very first triple-threat mascot on this listing: he can bite,  kick,  and punch/flap. Geese love flapping their fly order to avoid your interest while they attempt to attack you. That's the important things that would certainly frighten me the most with this mascot. I think this would genuinely be a 50-50 battle,  with the win mosting likely to whoever can maintain their endurance the longest-- honestly,  it may be him.Billy the Marlin (MLB Miami Marlins)I'm not mosting likely to exist to you individuals: this is where things will certainly obtain untidy. Billy The Marlin is an eight-foot high killing maker,  which wants he got his sword nose reduction a couple of periods earlier. Also with the change,  he has a legitimate tool extending from his face,  and he's not terrified to use it. Due to the fact that of his elevation,  he can drizzle down leaks from the top. Likewise-- and I have no method of confirming this-- I obtain the vibe that he deals with dirty. This coincides fish that tried to battle heavyweight mixed martial arts boxer Yoel Romero in 2017. Romero also flinched when Billy initially billed him,  due to the fact that he understands what Billy is capable of. There is no spirit behind Billy's eyes,  simply pure killing impulse.